Say Yes To No

Being a parent is both satisfying and exhausting. There are times that you feel so happy and contented because you know you have your kids around. You can spend time with them and learn more about their personalities. You also have the chance to engage in their world as they develop their skills and overall emotional and mental strength.

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However, despite the happiness you get, you can’t deny that you feel exhausted most of the time with all the responsibilities that come with parenting. Sometimes, you get too overwhelmed that you tend to lose control over your mental and emotional strength. With that, you suffer from series of health conditions, including stress, anxiety, and fatigue.

At first, I thought fatigue is just a physical manifestation of the chores I do every day. But with some of the frequently asked questions, I realized that there is more to it than meets the eye. Here are some of the answers I gather about fatigue and anxiety.

Is fatigue a symptom of anxiety? 

Yes. Physical exhaustion or fatigue is another potential symptom of anxiety disorder since the mental condition is commonly associated with hyperactivity. It causes ups and downs in the body’s energy levels. In some cases, fatigue follows an anxiety attack and can be chronic for others.

It would be an excellent help if you were mindful that it is important to seek immediate help when you experienced fatigue with anxiety. Please do not ignore the symptoms as they can escalate into a series of health conditions.

 Can anxiety make you tired all the time? 

Definitely! Since anxiety disrupts the brain’s functions, it can make you mentally and emotionally exhausted as it causes your brain to work overtime. That explains why people feel unable to function even if they have not done much physical work.

Perhaps that is due to the emotional, and mental agony one tries to deal with. Thus, it can be concluded that not because there is no sign of physical exhaustion does not mean that a person will not experience fatigue.

 How do I overcome anxiety and fatigue? 

Overcoming anxiety and fatigue needs to start with a clear perspective. Change the way you think about fatigue and not blame it exclusively on lack of sleep or overworked. Instead, increase your physical activity level, reduce caffeine intake, stay hydrated, watch what you eat, and get enough sleep.

Remember, fatigue can have different forms. It can come from physical, mental, and emotional. It would be best if you understood where your exhaustion comes from so that you can find better ways to manage it.

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 Does stress cause extreme fatigue? 

Yes. Too much stress can come from physical, mental, and emotional issues. And fatigue is a known symptom of mental health problems, such as anxiety, grief, and depression. It gets accompanied by other symptoms, including irritability, isolation, and lack of motivation.

If you think you are dealing with an overall imbalance, you should seek professional advice as soon as possible.

 What are the three types of fatigue? 

The three types of fatigue include transient or the inability of muscles to maintain optimal bodily performance. Next is cumulative that usually comes from the repeated mild sleep restriction or extended waking hours across a series of days. Lastly, there is a circadian where there is a disruption in the body’s regeneration cycle.

 What are the five emotional signs of stress? 

The most common emotional symptoms of stress include anxiety, moodiness, loneliness, feeling overwhelmed, and depression.

If ever you experienced one or more of these, please consult a health care provider right away.

 How do I get rid of the stress in my life? 

There is no shortcut to removing stress in your life because it is inevitable. However, you can always manage it with some of these tips: getting enough sleep, exercise regularly, drinking enough water, eating healthy foods, taking supplements, and quitting smoking and alcohol consumption. You can also relieve stress by going out for a walk, exploring nature, gardening, or spending time with friends and family.

Basically, you have to work on the best options that suit your needs. As long as you practice self-care and self-awareness, you will gather all the necessary coping methods to get rid of your stress in life.

 How to notice if I am having a nervous breakdown? 

You can easily tell that you are having a nervous breakdown when you experience constant depressive symptoms. These include the intense feeling of loneliness and isolation and sometimes having thoughts of self-harm and suicide. In unfortunate instances, you also experience restlessness, extreme mood swings, trembling, insomnia, and hallucinations.

If you’re not sure about the symptoms you might be experiencing, seek a piece of advice from a medical expert.

 Can anxiety cause body aches? 

Yes. Anxiety can have physical manifestations such as headaches, muscle tension, body soreness. That is because the body gets tense, and muscles begin to develop uncomfortable symptoms that may be all familiar.

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 What does anxiety physically feel like? 

Anxiety can potentially show enough and good physical signs. Its physical responses are the ones preparing you to face an extreme situation. However, when it gets too intense, you might start to feel a little nauseous and lightheaded.

 How can you reduce the physical symptoms of anxiety? 

The best way to reduce anxiety is to focus on self-care. Always maintain a good night’s sleep, so your mind and body can have enough time to rejuvenate. It would help if you also cut back on your alcohol and caffeine consumption since these can cause an imbalance in your health when taken too much. Quit smoking, and stay physically active as much as possible. If you can, you should practice deep breathing and meditate.

 What does anxiety pain feel like? 

Anxiety can cause a serious mental and emotional strain on your health. However, it can physically manifest, as well. It can make you faint and can make you feel dizzy. Anxiety can also make cause sudden chest pain that is frequently described as a sharp, stabbing sensation. These are what expert calls psychosomatic symptoms.

 Can anxiety make you feel weird? 

Anxiety can cause numbness, shakiness, and tingling that are commonly felt on the face, arms, hands, feet, and legs. Often, it makes you feel weird that you cannot even describe the instant changes that are happening all over your body. In some unfortunate instances, when you feel anxious, your heart rate speeds up, you get so sweaty, your body is trembling, and you feel uncomfortable even just standing or sitting.

 Does anxiety go away if you ignore it? 

No. Ignoring your anxiety will do nothing. It will not reduce it, nor take it away. Relentless thoughts can linger as long as it wants. However, there is a chance that you can potentially eliminate anxiety at mild levels. The severe ones are expected to stay and will require the necessary treatment and medication.

 Is it my heart or anxiety?

Acute anxiety is somehow comparable to a heart attack for some individuals who cannot entirely identify their mental and physical condition since many of the symptoms can seem the same. Perhaps that is because both conditions accompany symptoms such as chest pain, shortness of breath, sweating, increased heartbeat, dizziness, fatigue, and even temporary paralysis.

 

In our early childhood, we are all vulnerable, weak, and incapable of doing many things. We are children that are so fragile that they could get hurt anytime without warning. Everything around us is too much and feels mysterious, making our life out of control and sometimes unmanageable. That is why our need for protection and a hunger for a father, in all circumstances, is entirely natural. Perhaps that is because a father appears to us as immensely impressive, strong, and capable. It is as if he knows and can do almost anything that is beyond astonishing.

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However, the paradox of daddy issues tends to differ in all our experiences. That is because some of us, despite having one around, still feel emotionally and mentally left out. Well, we can’t blame anyone for that. We can never convince people to believe that their degree of emotional and mental issues is not that serious because, at some point, what they feel is valid. It gets supported by the complexity of sadness, emptiness, and longings.

Physically Abusive Father – A daddy issue can come from many forms of emotional and mental abuse. However, the common root of them all is physical abuse. It is a behavior that most of us consider “rightful” because the physically abusive one is the household’s most authoritative individual. Somehow, we justify our father’s hurtful actions because we believe that he is entitled to do that. Whatever damages his physical abuse may bring to our overall development, we think that it is okay because he is our dad, after all. Sadly, we take that mentality to adulthood, where we find ourselves acknowledging the behavior. As a result, we allow physical abuse to become present in our romantic relationships.

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Absent Father – There are a lot of reasons why some of us have an absent father. It could be because our mother hates our father that much that she doesn’t want him anywhere near us. Or perhaps it is because of personal instances like our father going to prison or war. Or maybe he just decided that he doesn’t want a family, so he vanished. Whatever the reason is, there are tons of it that we can think of. But despite understanding some of the possible situations, a daddy issue can still stir up because of the emptiness we feel inside. It leads to the creation of an unrealistic fatherly image that we eventually input in our minds. And as we grow up, we stick to that idea.

No-Care-At-All Father – Again, not because our father lives with us in one roof, that does not mean he is capable of fatherhood. Sometimes, there are instances that it is more likely convenient for us if he is not around. That is because of his no-care-at-all attitude that puts us in a different mix of emotions. Of course, it is understandable that some of our life issues are ours alone. However, as we grow up, there is a need for a father-image to guide us in every decision we make. When our father is disinterested in providing emotional and mental support, it damages our overall self-awareness. And as we venture to adulthood, we tend to view ourselves as unworthy of anyone’s attention. Thus, the more we prefer self-isolation.

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Financially Manipulative Father – For some of us, we see a father as financial support. Honestly, there is nothing wrong with that. In fact, it is their sole obligation to ensure that financial problems are well-sorted out. However, things can turn differently when our dad uses that obligation to mark entitlement and power. So whenever he feels angry and aggressive towards us for no reason, forgiveness becomes a must. Though, I’m not saying that we shouldn’t consider that as an option. But constantly excusing our father from physically, emotionally, mentally hurting us just because he is the provider is somehow unfair. It can take a toll on our adulthood stage because it can make us think that whoever puts food on the table will hold the powerful spot despite being unsympathetic.

Unloving Father – It is normal for us to long for a father. That explains why we feel the need to search for one whenever we experience an unfortunate situation. But our longing is not due to a lack of a fatherly image. Instead, it is a consequence of abandonment we feel emotionally. Our need to search for a fatherly image relates to our perception of a physically powerful male protection that can also care and love at the same time. Without it, we feel inclined to different patterns of behavior and emotional response. That explains why we secretly yearn for a gentleman to step in and hope to fulfill the unextinguished fantasy role we have about our dad.

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A perfect father doesn’t exist. However, there is always this good one that acknowledges his incapability and imperfections. And that is more than enough.

Have you ever asked yourself why you are the type of person you are right now? Well, depending on the household you grew up with, the way you build your character is based on your understanding of things around you. As cliché as it sounds, everything about your personality has something to do with your family’s impact on your childhood.

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Broken Marriage

When you look at your parents together, there is this ideology that they are meant for each other. Unfortunately, that is not often the case. Since divorce rates are skyrocketing, there is a vast chance that you also end up with a broken family. So if your parents separate, especially when you are still young, you might expect more from your relationship when you grow up. A broken marriage always impacts your personality. It changes your relationship demands, making you want a higher degree of morality, attention, loyalty, and compassion. Though it may quite seem reasonable, it takes a toll over time. It makes you less likely to trust other people, making you more doubtful and confused in a relationship.

Overly Attached Parents

It is usual for parents to show their love and affection through constant concerns. But when your parents are overly attached to you, there is a tendency that you may grow up codependent. That is because you get used to your family doing almost everything for you. Yes, they may mean well as they believe that what they are doing is always what is best for you. However, this particular practice has harmful side effects. You would more likely to grow up unable to make decisions for your own. You will experience a troubled life as an adult because you become more reliant with people. You will have more problems adapting to simple work life.

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Authoritarian Parenting

As a child, you believe that parents always know best. That is why you tend to follow and listen to their commands. However, when your parents are more authoritarian, it leads to damaging effects. When you grow up with parents who make all the decisions for you without considering your feelings, you develop mental illness. Usually, anxiety and depression come in because this type of parenting experience can make you assume that you are not competent enough to do things on your own. Often, your parents that do not listen to you and force you to do something that makes you unhappy results in having feelings of worthlessness. It also feeds your low-self-esteem, which follows you through adulthood.

Noisy And Loud Household

Contrary to what other people think, a noisy household does not promote a better family relationship. It does not, at any cost, represent better communication. When you and your family are regularly on this crack of expressing yourselves through frequent arguments, it does not guarantee an improved understanding. Typically, this type of family relationship impacts you as you grow older. When everybody in the family focuses on expressing themselves without listening to others’ opinions, it creates chaos. There is a tendency that this type of communication results in self-centeredness and close-mindedness.

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Emotional Abuse

Emotional abuse in the family is a discreet problem. No one can determine whether you are experiencing it in your home. Unfortunately, an emotionally abusive family relationship among you, your parents, and siblings often end up in negative adjustments. When you grow up in a household full of hostility, there is a tendency that you will apply those undesirable traits to your wife or husband and kids. That is because emotional abuse tends to alter the way you see things. It makes you dwell on the cynical perspective that getting emotionally hurt is somehow okay. And as you deal with other people, you will stick to the idea that emotions are the only core of every decision-making, which is unlikely near the truth.

Physical Punishment

Some people understand that it is illegal to spank a child because it is seen as physical abuse. It creates harmful side effects, depending on the severity of the damage. Usually, it ranges from emotional, physical, and mental disabilities. When your parents often try to influence your behavior by imposing physical punishment, things can sometimes go either good or bad. It may cause you to become more resilient, inconsiderate, and unpredictable. But at some point, it can also teach you discipline, perseverance, and endurance. Physical punishment is not all wrong. However, depending on how your parents will impose, it is a different story.

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Insight

Your personality is not from the combination of good and bad traits you want to have. You are you because of your environment, social connection, and upbringing. But it is also important to note that whether good or bad personality, only you can make up your mind and decide which traits should stay and which ones should be removed.

 

 

As the COVID-19 pandemic continues to shift everybody’s lives, your children must have many questions for you. And as a parent, you want to keep your children involved and informed at all times so they wouldn’t feel left out in the conversation. But it can be hard to find the right balance of giving information and overwhelming them with the truth. So how can you talk with your children about the recent pandemic? Here are some tips you can use.

Talk To Your Children Calmly And Reassuringly

According to Jacqueline Sperling, Ph.D., “It is important to model calmness when talking about the virus. Children will look to you to see how afraid they should be.” Therefore, if you’re trying to speak to them on why they can’t go outside and need to take precautions during this time, do it calmly and with a composed attitude. 

Explain to your children that young people like them are less likely to catch the virus. Reassure them that this situation is only temporary and that many professionals are working hard to help get people’s lives back to normal. Make them feel safe and notify them that the people they care about are safe, too, since children tend to worry more about others than themselves.

Be Truthful And Allow Them To Lead The Discussion

Don’t use complex answers to their questions. As much as possible, make it concise and straightforward so that your children can quickly grasp the information you’re giving them. Too much information can create more fear and anxiety. Only provide honest responses. Your children also deserve to know how they can keep themselves safe, and if any of their loved ones are at risk of getting the virus.

Only provide information that your children asked. Allow them to lead the conversation. It can help you level with their cognitive maturity and avoid giving scary details that they may not be curious about. It’s okay if your children don’t seem interested in the pandemic. Do also prevent yourself from using language that may seem harmful to other races or cultures to avoid generating hate to particular groups of people. 

If there are questions that you don’t know the answer to, then research about it. Go to reliable health organizations’ websites to get facts like the World Health Organization (WHO) and the Centers for Disease Control and Prevention (CDC). 

Give Them Responsibility 

Giving your children power and responsibility allows them to do better and make decisions that are beneficial to others. Make them feel in control by providing them specific things to do. For example, inform them that they should wash their hands for 20 seconds or as long as it takes to finish the “Happy Birthday” song twice.

Tell them that they should get lots of sleep, eat healthy meals, and exercise to avoid contracting the disease. Be a good role model and perform these tasks as well.  

You can also inform them why many people seem to be wearing masks and prevent getting physically close together. Tell them that it helps to stop the spread of the virus and that they should practice it. Remind them to clean their devices like cell phones or tablets often or to not cough or sneeze without a mask or handkerchief. And if they have to do so, it’s much better to do it with their elbows.  

Tell Them That It’s Okay Not To Feel Okay 

Tell your children that their emotions are valid and that it’s okay to feel stressed. Starting this conversation early on prevents them from thinking that there’s something wrong about feeling such things, which is not the case. Recognizing these overwhelming emotions and understanding that challenging times will pass can build resilience as they grow older. 

It can help if you make yourself accessible and ask how they often feel so they can open their feelings to you much more relaxed. Some children can easily express how they feel while some don’t. So it will be natural if you continuously check on them and give them space to share their fears. Let them know that they can always come to you for answers and confide when things are getting scary. 

Your children will need your warmth and love, especially at a trying time like this. The following days will be different and hard for all of us as we go through the “new normal.” And as a parent, you, too, have your share of doubts and anxiety. Take care of yourself. You and your family will get through this. Have faith. Use this time to keep your family closer and stronger together.  

 

Source: commons.wikimedia.org

 

The 2019 Bernie Event was, needless to say, all about the life of Bernie Sanders, the 78-year-old politician, intellectual leader, and popular socialist democrat. Hundreds of supporters, including his family, friends, political allies, and followers were present and just wanted to wish him well after his recent heart surgery. It can be recalled that a few days before his surgery, Bernie told his friends at a campaign event he was in that he didn’t feel well and that his chest was painful. When he was brought to the hospital, it was later discovered that he had a blocked artery; hence, the stent insertion surgery was done. When he faced the public during the event in his honor, he was talking and thankfully in good spirits. The Democratic well-wishers were there to support him and his family, some of which prepared short speeches, mostly hoping that he would soon be in great shape.

Who Is Bernie Sanders?

He is a 78-year-old Brooklyn-born American who now lives and works in Washington. He was a former mayor who then had a seat at Congress in 1990. In 2006, he became a Democratic senator. Finally, in 2016, he was runner-up to Hillary Clinton for Democratic Presidential Primary.

Bernie, The Democratic Socialist

Up until today, being one has no precise definition, but Democratic socialism has become a strong force in the political life of America. Generally speaking, it can be described as within the classification of social democracy and communism, which is also common in Europe. Democratic socialists, as Bernie Sanders is being described, do not agree with the principles of capitalism. This means that they encourage workers to have control over the means of production. Although they can be somehow communistic, they also believe that socialism must be attained democratically.

 

Source: en.wikipedia.org

 

His Student Loan Debt Program

One of Mr. Sanders’ reasons for being popular was his proposal to eliminate the tuition fees of the public university and college students. When Senator Elizabeth Warren pushed to trash this proposal, Mr. Sanders pushed it more by helping introduce the legislation to eliminate all of America’s student debts. He earned praises for this plan and gained more supporters, especially those coming from the education sector, although some analysts were doubtful of the plan’s feasibility.

The Medicare For All Bill

When he became senator, Mr. Sanders then reintroduced his previous Medicare-for-all plan in order to shift America to a single-payer healthcare setup, one where one government-enforced program gives insurance coverage to all citizens of the United States. His plan visualizes a future where every citizen has insurance coverage and will pay nothing from their own pockets when they visit their physician. The Medicare For All Plan consists of a benefits package that is much more unsparing than the rest of the single-payer countries such as Canada, which offers this to their citizens, including employers and employees with new income taxes.

 

Source: thenation.com

 

At a time that Mr. Sanders reintroduced this plan, Democratic representatives and American voters were increasingly supporting a government-run healthcare program. He then introduced his bill with the support of 14 co-sponsors, including his former rival, Elizabeth Warren. What others also refer to as the Sanders Plan also describes the kind of coverage the American people would receive. However, it lacks more detail as to how it would fun quite a generous healthcare benefits package. He instead released a paper that contained a list of financing alternatives, like a different tax rate for ‘extreme wealth.’

“The only way we can win this election and create a government and economy that work for all is with a grassroots movement — the likes of which has never been seen in American history.” – Bernie Sanders

 

 

The 2018 Parenting Summit was a great way to meet other parents like me who are challenged. I have three kids, and I am a proud single parent. My husband died right after I gave birth to our third child, and we miss him every day. Our eldest child, Kayden, looks for him almost every single day. We lost Kamshad in just a few months before the summit. Can you imagine a 25-year-old little lady like me with three kids in tow and no husband?

Continue reading “Single Parent, All Good!”

Some states in the US and other countries enforced curfew laws to specific age groups like teenagers below 18 years old. They are not allowed to stay in public places in certain hours like 10 pm to 6 am the next day, but with some exemptions in cases such as under adult or parents’ supervision. The implemented curfew law was received with different reactions and complains, mostly among youths.  

Continue reading “How Parents Can Help Impose Curfew Laws “

When you are a parent, you need to have confidence in how you discipline your children. It is vital that you are sure of your ways and how they are going to help their welfare. However, at some point, there is going to be a question in your head whether you are doing the right thing or not. According to a clinical psychologist, you are raising your children well if they are opening up to you, but what if they don’t? Does that mean you are too strict or too lenient?

Continue reading “Parents Should Let Their Children Rest A Little Bit”

Being a parent is a challenging role to play. Often, you doubt yourself if you are doing the right thing to raise your children. You are not sure whether you should be strict or cool. You love your children, and you want them to love you, but sometimes, it is just impossible because there are particular rules that you need to implement which make them hate you. 

If you are one of those parents who are strict and worried that they might be doing parenting wrong, then take a deep breath and relax. You should be praising yourself and tapping yourself on the back because you are more likely to raise responsible and successful children. 
Continue reading “Strict Parents Are More Likely To Raise Successful Children “